Monday, May 30, 2011

On Your Left!

Ugh.. What a day yesterday was. I was dreading it the entire weekend. Sunday. Marathon water table. When Kate brought up the fact that the marathon was fast approaching and that we'd be back at the same spot we were last year I immediately thought of a way out. After some hemming and hawing Kate finally brought up the fact of "You were more than willing to do it last year!"

At this point I was going to snap back with a response on how we were just in the beginning stages of our relationship and I was trying my damndest to impress her.... but then I realized that maybe I should just shut my mouth. So there I was 9am on my bicycle riding to the water table because all of the damn roads around town are pretty much closed for the day. I had gone on a rager of a bike ride the night before and my legs made sure they reminded me of that as I pedaled the six mile ride to the water table.

It was all pretty much the same as last year but this year I stayed a pourer, and did not dare venture over to the hander outer side of the table. You go from doing nothing to so busy you don't have time to look up for the next three hours busy in about ten minutes. All in all the water table was uneventful, I did chuckle a bit when Kerri got a whole tub of gatorade poured on her feet, luckily she was in sandals. As the event came to a close I shoveled a small mountain of cups into to about 8 garbage bags and called it a day. I saddled white lightning and prepared for the quick enjoyable ride home. I decided it would be awesome for a quick jaunt down the bike path since it was usually a bit cooler down by the water. This was the first mistake I would make in the next 45 minutes. Little did I remember that the last leg of the god damn marathon finished on the bike path. So as I get on the path I have to weave my way through packs of sweaty smelly beasts. I mostly rode on the side of the path in the dirt. As the race finished the traffic on the bike path thinned and I was able to pick up my pace. I was about two miles from home and really cooking when I noticed a large pack of people on bikes in front of me. Not a problem I thought, I don't even have to break pace I'll just pass them on the left. Second mistake and most painful mistake of the day.

So like a smart cyclist I shouted a warning to this pack of people that I was coming up on their left. This is a known tactic by pretty much all mankind,it goes for biking, and skiing and pretty much anything/anywhere you are going to be with larger groups of people. You are warning them that you are coming toward them on their left and to get the fuck out of the way. As I gain on this pack I start repeating myself, a bit louder each time just to give ample warning that I would be shooting by them like a lightning bolt on their left-hand side. Well I must have shouted one too many times and really confused this dipshit of a middle aged man because just as I'm abreast of the pack he shoots out to the left. Literally five fucking feet in front of me. I don't remember what happened from there. All I remember is standing up and seeing blood fountaining out of my face and a horrified look on the dipshit's wife's face as she screamed someone call 911! I did a quick check and found that this blood was coming out of my nose, it was instantly numb and I could not feel it yet I knew that this was not a good situation. The only reason this particular dipshit didn't lose his life at the end of my fists was that I literally did not know what was going on. I think I was knocked out on the pavement for a good 30 seconds before I stood up. I don't know what was going through my mind, I think fearing that somehow I was going to get in trouble for running into this guy had me hopping on white lightning and making a break for it.

I finally got home carried my bike up the stairs and walked into the bathroom. I feel bad for anyone who I passed on the way home because I literally looked like a zombie that had just eaten someone, blood all over my face.

It was at that point I started fearing that my nose was broken as it was swollen and still bleeding. Here it is still bleeding as I finish washing off all the caked on blood.



The rest of the evening consisted of icing my face and waiting for my girlfriend to get home with the peroxide to get some of the dirt out. I'd say the scariest part was when I picked a large chunk of "white matter" out of my nose, and lost my shit. I have a really weak stomach when it comes to blood,cuts,bones and getting hurt. As I pulled a large size of this "white matter" out of my nose thinking it was part of my nose bone I instantly became light headed. I had to lay on the floor because I thought I was seriously going to pass out. Kate said I went from white to green, luckily she got me a cold rag and explained to me that it was a rock that I pulled out of my nose, not a piece of broken bone. That calmed me down but I'm still not convinced it wasn't bone. Ugh just thinking about it makes me sick right now. Fuck a marathon, I don't give a shit next year I'll be at home sleeping and that's that.

Today I woke up feeling like I was hit by a truck. Scratches, bruises and cuts in places I didn't even realize were hurt. Not to mention a headache and pretty much a dull throbbing throughout my body, kindly reminding me that yes I was indeed pretty hurt. Oh and a nose so swollen I can see the sides of my nose in my normal vision.
I still managed to get a lot of things done. I took out a mountain of recycling, installed the A/C into our room and did a huge pile of dishes, all before 2pm est. After that Kate and I went to her parents house and had a nice afternoon grill session with her family. All in all a good day. If only yesterday didn't happen it would have been the best week I had in a very very long time.


Why is that you ask? Well there is this!




Yup. That's right. Finally they are mine. Finally.

Also, still quite a bit of people who don't know but I got a job in a new department at work. I don't move into my new department until July, but I am already super excited to get started. More details to come on that in the near future. Such an amazing week, too bad we can't just erase yesterday from existence, but you gotta take the good with the bad.

I have been killing this song lately, I feel almost hypnotized when listening to the hook.

No comments:

Post a Comment

What do you think?